ohmyfurandwhiskers: (get comfy and read!)
Since being fired, I have filled out 18 job applications, have a flimsy idea of a resume in process, and discovered that I can type 80-85 wpm (depending on how cold my fingers are whilst typing).

I haven't really been doing much with my time aside from reading at Coffee Cartel, watching DVDs, cleaning random areas of my apartment, fretting/crying, and harassing my friends via text messages.

On Thursday, I was on my way to deposit the little cash I did have at the bank when I came across Frogger and her Llama unloading store supplies at CC. Frogger told me I was going to go to lunch with them when I told her I wasn't doing anything. We ended up at Central Café and Bakery where Frogger and I ordered falafel (my first experience with it and I, of course, loved it) and her Llama ordered some sort of chicken wrap and something hookah-ish. (I don't really know much about hookah aside from that it smells good.)

I have to say I really love Central Café and Bakery's grape leaves and I wanted to order the baba ghanoush but they demanded I order an actual meal. I wasn't going to force it as Frogger was being kind enough to pay so perhaps some other time when I have a job again. I felt guilty because of the money but I'm trying not to. She's been very generous. I don't feel like I deserve it. Anyway, I love Middle Eastern food. If I could live off stuffed grape leaves and hummus, I would. Although, I would miss unagi very much if I did.

I'm obviously really hungry. Heh. That was the first real food I'd had since I was fired. I mean, I've had a couple of bagels here and there but there's not much nutritional value in those aside from carbohydrates/glucose. I moved some money around and it's fucking me over but I have a $50 credit available on one of the cards I was trying to pay off so I'm going to see if I can use that to buy some fruit or something later today.

My last paycheck didn't cover my rent. So I had to borrow $30 from my bank to pay it. Yay fun! I just keeping making my situation worse for myself. It's pretty awesome.

I'm sort of running out of energy... I think I'll read s'more...

009. Punish

Tuesday, January 3rd, 2012 08:39 pm
ohmyfurandwhiskers: (remember love)
I've been watching a lot of documentaries lately, which I can't decide is a bad thing or not considering it forces me to think about how shitty our world is. I've watched three on religion, one on dumpster diving, and the one I'm watching right now is about Wal-Mart's horrible business practices. When I can't stop thinking and I start getting really, really depressed and need to escape those thoughts, I put Scrubs on. I don't know what I would do without Netflix to distract me.

Or, without Pepé. This morning, I came up with a plan if I can't find a job and the only thing that kept me from following through with it right then was reminding myself that he cares about me. He puts headphones on when he plays Call of Duty because he knows I hate the sound of gunfire (I have trouble enough watching shows like Law & Order) and put them on when I was still sleeping and he wanted to listen to music. He never pushes me and apologizes when I tell him if I feel pressured by something. He's incredibly patient and generous... buying me coffee and a muffin already. He cares. And... we're exclusive. Heh. Like teenagers, I swear. When we were talking about it, I said 'So, we're going steady' and we laughed and he said 'If that's what you want to call it. Yeah.' Ridiculous. I love it.

I need to start working on my resume again soon. I just need to distract myself right now. I mean, I seriously considered suicide this morning. I think my brain needs a break from stress right now.

I'm trying not to panic, knowing that I don't have enough money to pay my rent right now. It's really difficult to function. I caved and got squishy this morning to prevent myself from hurting myself. I don't know how I'm going to get through this sober.

Profile

ohmyfurandwhiskers: (Default)
D. Troy

July 2012

S M T W T F S
1234567
891011121314
15161718192021
22 232425262728
293031    

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Thursday, September 21st, 2017 09:04 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios